I sit here on my study table with my MP3 player on, trying to shut out the sounds of Barney and of the kids. They want to be in the same room with me when I am home. I try my very best to concentrate but I am fraught with worry. My heart is filled with concerns. Lord, talo talaga ako pag namomroblema na ako masyado. Please help me learn to handle my anxiety, to deal with the realities of life well. I offer you this list of concerns that bug me and I humbly lay them down on Your feet:

I woke up, Lord, and saw my countdown before the exam. 80 days! I am currently reading my manual, and jump from the text to the manual and back, and my heart is filled with fear as sometimes, when I go back to things that I’m supposed to have read, it feels like I am seeing them for the first time. It feels like I do not remember a thing! And this fear and anxiety hide in the background of everything that I do. I try to focus on other things when I have to; I pretend not to see it but it is always there.

I worry about my unfinished research papers. It gives me this sick feeling in my stomach when I think of my unfinished work and each deadline that has gone past. Now, I really need to finish it by the first week of May. The pressure is coming on.

I worry about hubby’s work. This reorganization in their company makes things less settled than before, less unsure. I do not worry about Your provision, Lord, for You have always, always taken good care of us. I do worry about his career path. He is very much concerned about the direction his career path is heading to. Please lead him, Lord, to where You want Him to be.

I worry about Ate and her dental abscess.

I worry about the kids, in general. They’re watching too much TV, mainly because I let them. It gives me the chance to read in peace (with my earplugs on, of course, to block out all the bickering, fighting, and never-ending questions). It is so unhealthy. And I am always on edge, my patience runs thin because of all these useless worries and anxiety.

I worry about our household help. One is due to leave by the end of the month, and the other two have expressed their desire of leaving soon after.

I worry about sister’s pregnancy and her upcoming delivery. I come across all these medical problems in pregnancy during my review and I am gripped with fear.

I worry about starting my practice – the where, the when, and the how. I look around at colleagues and am happy for where they are now. Why do I have these feelings of inadequacy, like I feel that I cannot do what they do?

I worry about my nanny’s health, our messy home, the kids’ disheveled closets that need sorting. Worry, worry, worry. It’s beginning to wear me out, Lord.

Please accept these, Lord. I do not know what to do with them. Take charge of my life. Please pray for me, Mama Mary. Lord, thank You.

For when I am worried or upset

Be full of joy always because you belong to the Lord. Again I say, be full of joy!
Let all people see how gentle you are. The Lord is coming again soon.
Do not worry. Learn to pray about everything. Give thanks to God as you ask Him for what you need.
The peace of God is much greater than the human mind can understand. This peace will keep your hearts and minds through Jesus Christ.
- Philippians 4:4-7