Dearest A,

Driving to L_____ this morning gave me much time to pause and think. I realize how increasingly difficult it has become to discipline our three kids. Each has his or her own unique personality, and for reasons that are still unclear to me, they seem to put on their worst behavior whenever we are around. An attempt at catching our attention? Probably.

I also thought about what happened last night when the kids were noisily playing on our bed and they woke you up from your sleep, causing you to kick the Big Boy’s toys off the bed. I know you did not mean to do it. Please bear with me as I share with you some of my thoughts. I admit I am far from being a patient mother myself. Just an hour before that incident, I threw the empty alcohol bottle to show how displeased I was that Little One played with and wasted my stuff again. I have huge planks in my eye that need to be weeded out. I write this because we are a team. And as a team, our aim is to raise and love our kids the best way we can.

I found the incident a very sad moment. When the toys flew off of the bed and landed on the floor, the Big Boy did not show any change in the expression on his face. He had spent a considerable amount of time arranging those toys to make them look like a ship… you know how fond he is of building things. After the incident, he neither showed anger nor hurt, not even surprise. I found it very sad that he simply went about picking up his toys and rearranging them as if having toys thrown off beds was a most natural and ordinary occurrence in our home.

You and I both work very hard to give them the best and most comfortable life we can give. Sometimes, it makes us too tired to listen to their tiny and mundane concerns and, I speak for myself here hon, I admit that most days it is easier to just lie in bed and read my book or Facebook than to listen or spend time with them. You’re better off as I can see your effort in taking time to read them storybooks. I am guilty and today I pray to the Lord that He would send all the help we need so we can be the parents that He has meant us to be. As I’ve read somewhere, no amount of success can compensate for failure in the home. If I become a successful ______gist but turn out to be a bad mother, I would consider my life a complete waste. May God bless us both and teach us always. I love you so much.

K