tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86336905234173435452011-12-01T00:09:31.379+08:00My life's joys and struggles. Taking the journey into becoming a better person, wife, & mother. Living life one day at a time.Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.comBlogger1671100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-13414518966171544202010-11-08T20:27:00.001+08:002010-11-08T20:30:46.271+08:00

I never thought one thousand pesos can make me this happy... Got myself a beader book for my Tita J, a couple of yoga magazines for my cousin (yup, I admit, I will have to browse over them first before handing them over to her), a golf instruction mag for hubby, parents magazine (the article on “how to handle whining” caught my eye), an Oprah, and last but definitely the least… a crochet book (

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-11579870816868795292010-11-07T20:42:00.004+08:002010-11-08T20:44:28.933+08:00

Today, I became enlightened. Out of the blue, I told hubby that starting this month, I'll be taking care of the Meralco bill. Now, that felt good.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-70597707524282709862010-11-06T15:10:00.002+08:002010-11-08T20:45:54.655+08:00

I still get a genuine kick out of living in our tiny suburban paradise. Peeking through our windows while the gentle breeze caresses me gives me joy.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-70047530978679034852010-11-04T01:58:00.004+08:002010-11-04T10:12:07.765+08:00

Today, they’ve lit up the streets of Makati. Saw it on TV. It brought back beautiful memories of my Dad driving us along Ayala/Paseo de Roxas in our good old VW Beetle when we were little. Back then, we never shopped in Makati. Christmas shopping was done in Cubao (then later on SM City – now North Edsa). But the folks made it a point to drive us through the bright lights. It made me feel even

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-82556784348015898212010-11-03T08:36:00.003+08:002010-11-03T08:53:58.645+08:00

Nothing gives me greater satisfaction than rising up early. I keep wondering why I do not find the discipline to do it every day. This morning, I woke and fought the strong urge to count the number of hours I’ve slept and the even stronger urge to get back to bed. Grabbed my Bible and Our Daily Journal, said a short prayer, and greeted my mother-in-law on her birthday. My youngest Little One

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-86901270248005332132010-10-25T10:32:00.002+08:002010-11-01T16:43:45.496+08:00

Am all alone at home, hubby, the kids and their ates are out-of-town swimming together with the in-laws to celebrate grandma’s birthday. I was tossing and turning the whole night because of an ugly, intermittently throbbing, left-sided headache. I could have come with them today but I desperately wanted to end this pain that has been dragging on and off for the past three days. Don’t you just

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-66081335840335534542010-10-18T18:01:00.002+08:002010-10-18T18:05:50.220+08:00

It seems like all I've really been doing since yesterday was to snap. I snapped at my kids. I snapped at my husband. I snapped at our kasambahays (helpers). It's sad that I have been using my illness as a sorry, worn-out excuse. First things first: please allow myself to rant. I have been dealing with my tinnitus for more than a year now. The ENT I am currently seeing (my fourth one) is one of

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-29470978420670384162010-08-20T17:55:00.000+08:002010-11-03T09:28:29.625+08:00

I just love my garden and all of its imperfections. My lop-sided topiaries cannot seem to decide whether they want to become spheres or cylinders (with flat tops and bottoms). The grass still has some bald patches. Despite my (and husband’s) diligent hours of transplanting the stray roots, the bare patches remain. They patiently wait for the nearby grass stalks to come creeping in. The gladiola

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-3612562632904111702010-08-18T09:12:00.002+08:002010-11-03T09:30:10.087+08:00

Those two weeks are finally over. Two weeks of joy-lessness, hopelessness and discouragement. After a tearful episode with mom and a lot of thinking over things, I have come to accept my condition. And acceptance, as circumstances later revealed, is the key to lightening one’s burdens. It was also a huge help that my loved ones (most especially hubby) and their closest friends were praying for me

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-86980141426648233352010-08-12T11:48:00.001+08:002010-11-03T09:02:35.863+08:00

Living on the edge? No. These days it feels more like I’m living on the brink. On the brink of my sanity, that is.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-68046692751498060052010-07-28T11:24:00.002+08:002010-11-03T09:10:19.480+08:00

For the past two weeks or so, I have been suffering from bad headaches every day. I have been popping all sorts of pills and I worry about the ill effects these may have on my liver or kidney, most especially on my tinnitus. This worrying about the pills (among other things) could very well be the same fuel that feeds this vicious cycle. Now I take the time to sit and pause to thank God for

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-48844651627927435232010-07-18T21:35:00.003+08:002010-11-03T09:07:48.029+08:00

1. Make God No. 1 2. Time is sacred 3. Live a balanced life Addendum: Remember – all the saints were busy people! (Let us ask for the grace to always make God number 1 in spite of our busy lives) - From Homily, Don Bosco 8:30 am Mass (must remember to get the priest’s name)

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-33973120473868987122010-07-08T08:36:00.005+08:002010-07-08T23:31:41.239+08:00

I feel light and happy this morning because it’s Thursday, my day off! Well, it’s not exactly rest day. It’s more like an errand day for me but any break I can get away from the hospital or from my clinic makes me happy all the same. Last night, for the first time since hubby had left for a week-long business trip last weekend, I had restful sleep. It felt good. It was a mere 5-hour sleep but

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-63090439062036295722010-07-06T22:43:00.002+08:002010-07-08T23:26:56.325+08:00

I cannot believe it’s been three and a half weeks since we’ve moved into our new home. Hubby and I are immensely grateful for this great blessing… I guess you can say it is our dream home for not too long ago all we could do was to dream about it. Praise God! Which brings me to this/these other thing/s – boxes and boxes of stuff still waiting to be unpacked! All of us pitched in as we gradually

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-72495977819497248372010-05-28T21:42:00.002+08:002010-11-03T09:31:53.258+08:00

This is too funny. Things like these always happen in cycles. One can only manage to laugh knowing that everything always turns out for the better in the end. Just ten days ago, I’ve written about how things were looking up and proceeded to enumerate the things I was really grateful for. Countless blessings! Now, I remain grateful… with just a few “concerns” (a.k.a. worries) in my mind. I felt

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-27811953611295708662010-05-26T17:37:00.003+08:002010-11-03T09:19:48.492+08:00

Today, with the help of Tita J, I finally dragged myself to the ear specialist, Dr. C. I have been trying my best to ignore my tinnitus for the past 10 months. I tried to live with it with as little whining as possible (I have been barely successful with this one, hubby can attest to that). I have finally managed to make time for it. I cancelled my clinic for today. After having spoken with Dr.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-27304741655242753722010-05-19T19:28:00.005+08:002010-11-03T09:35:20.335+08:00

Had 2 patients today at U__ (1 was HMO) and zero patient at S____. Frankly, I do not feel bad. I felt kinda relieved actually. In the next few days/one and a half week, we’ll be preoccupied. There’s my repeat pure tone audiometry test and ENT consult (4th opinion!) that’s long overdue. Plus our moving in to our new home is happening sometime next week. Hooray! Praise God. We’re going to be busy

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-19532874516396832292010-05-12T23:46:00.000+08:002010-05-12T23:46:09.983+08:00

God is great. Anxiously, I clutched my things and began to tread on unfamiliar territory. I breathed a silent prayer in my heart that everything will turn out okay. He answered my prayer by sending over a familiar, friendly face. A minute’s worth of smiles and encouragement was more than enough to comfort me and boost my confidence. All is well. All will be well.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-85719220540668092392010-05-04T23:26:00.009+08:002010-11-03T09:13:41.818+08:00

Today I’ve met with some of my colleagues. Some were much older and ”senior”. A handful were quite younger but have started their practice way before I started mine. As I spoke with hubby about how my day went, he noticed that I was making comments about how ‘big-time’ so-and-so already is. That is, ‘big’ enough such that their hotel accommodations for the convention have been graciously

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-23856569147862458942010-04-25T00:56:00.001+08:002010-05-12T23:39:57.181+08:00

It shames me that I dare to feel and think this way when everything in life is going well. Everyone in the family is healthy (save for my tinnitus). There is food on the table. There are two sets of helping hands. Our new house is almost done. And all are at peace. This past week brought with it feelings of emptiness and discontent. As silly as it may sound, I am fraught with worry that because

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-60843034633238992712010-04-19T11:51:00.007+08:002010-11-03T09:27:13.313+08:00

Driving to L_____ this morning gave me much time to pause and think. I realize how increasingly difficult it has become to discipline our three kids. Each has his or her own unique personality, and for reasons that are still unclear to me, they seem to put on their worst behavior whenever we are around. An attempt at catching our attention? Probably. I also thought about what happened last night

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-31674318862142962282010-04-18T13:47:00.002+08:002010-05-12T23:37:16.072+08:00

I finally got around to doing the groceries. Yesterday, I felt a sharp pang of guilt as I reached for our coffee canister only to find it empty. More so when I wanted to make some milk for the kids at breakfast and was told by our kasambahay, “Ate, wala na rin po”. Ayayay, what kind of a mother am I? Too busy the whole week and spent my free time working on frustrating and utterly useless

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-66976442918480790822010-03-11T22:03:00.000+08:002010-05-12T23:33:56.627+08:00

This week, I was swamped by referrals and new patients. Okay, okay… ‘swamped’ is an exaggeration. But they were plenty enough to keep me busy. It left me no time to whine about my tiniest troubles and left me scrambling about with a smile in my heart. Every day I drive 80 to 120 km. Every night, my sleep is interrupted by updates and lab results. One doesn’t mind and instead, chooses to be

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-85836119109856503082010-03-07T00:20:00.003+08:002010-05-12T23:28:39.649+08:00

Ah, finally. Some quiet time. One enjoys this moment, sitting at the desk with no sound but the whir of the electric fan blades. Since the yayas have unexpectedly left on Valentine’s day, I have become too busy that the lines that separate one day from the next have become a blur. I am thankful that one of the yayas has come back about two weeks ago. Still, I found myself constantly moving from

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-89861183684005333702010-02-21T23:02:00.002+08:002010-05-12T23:23:53.641+08:00

It’s been eight days since the yayas have left without any warning. I’ve mopped floors and washed dishes and clothes and packed away toys and cooked and uncluttered and bathed kids and ironed clothes and just worked myself to bits. I yelled a lot and spanked some. My back ached. Thankfully, the kids watched TV for a couple of hours early this evening while hubby cooked. It afforded me some

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-58567286859401864452010-02-04T08:21:00.001+08:002010-02-04T11:00:58.141+08:00

The other day, Mom and I were taking over dinner about wanting to try yoga. There was no yoga class in our hometown. My family and I, on the other hand, are to move into a new place in a couple of months and I knew, thru a cousin, that a yoga class was available. I felt excited. I’ve heard and read tons about the benefits of yoga – the way it helps relieve stressed muscles and minds, and about

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-79980115844253630682010-01-07T21:39:00.001+08:002010-01-14T21:43:52.106+08:00

1. Exercise - Stretch, yoga, walk, run! I am not getting any younger. I need to take better care of my body and my health, not only for my sake, but for the sake of my children. 2. More time with the kids - More face-to-face time, not just over the phone when I’m away. or glancing over my shoulder as I busily type on my computer. Not just homework time. More fun times. 3. Patience - Control

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-23552550189193411652010-01-07T18:03:00.001+08:002010-01-14T21:45:18.658+08:00

You know what exhausts me the most? It’s not loads of work. It’s not traffic jams. It is INDECISION. Nothing can be more draining than mulling over a choice, especially if it entails choosing between good and good. In my experience, it doesn’t have to be as life-changing as choosing one’s place of practice. Even mundane things such as which blouse to wear, or choosing whether I should go ahead

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-18523853490918300772010-01-06T12:42:00.001+08:002010-01-26T00:44:07.885+08:00

Notes from my 2009 Our Daily Journey (before I finally put it away): January 3 • Make a beaten pathway. Come to Me. Make it your practice to approach Me over and over again. • Regardless of your situation, circumstances, or state of health, God is ready to work powerfully in you and through you. January 6 • Attack problems, not people. “You have heard that it has been said, ‘you must love your

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-44144118313242893542010-01-05T11:30:00.000+08:002010-01-14T21:32:36.253+08:00

There’s something inspiring and truly refreshing about the New Year. It brings along hope for the future. It offers a fresh start. Today, I am determined to leave behind past hurts and heartaches. I will move on and not let unfair treatment and abuse cause any more pain. Right now I pause and pray for one particular person. I forgive her, and then ask God to forgive me. I take this step. I

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-82574975814761295422009-12-17T13:10:00.001+08:002009-12-22T00:04:34.364+08:00

Lately, I’ve been having recurring dreams with themes centered on significant people in my past. I wonder why. Some were about these people having a great interest in sharing and living their lives with me. I, on the other hand, had an excuse for not being able to reciprocate such as being engaged to be married to someone else, or simply being uninterested. After such dreams, I find myself

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-28325617416691101262009-12-11T22:50:00.002+08:002009-12-16T00:35:22.891+08:00

In high school, I took pride in the fact that I was low-maintenance. All I needed was shampoo and bath soap and that was it. A classmate asked me what I was using to clean my face and I was happy to say, “Wala, tubig lang”. For a while, I tried hopping on the bandwagon and used Biore just like all the other girls in the dorm. But it left my skin feeling so dry and taut so I threw it out. Since

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-18222538148599886192009-12-05T02:29:00.002+08:002009-12-10T08:18:24.380+08:00

My career is off to a very slow crawl. Colleagues and mentors say I need to be patient and prepare myself to endure this for the next two years. Despite this, I have to say I’m feeling quite happy. Sure, I do not have lots of money. But I do have work (with no boss, as my sister enviously points out) AND I have time for a few of my other interests… interests that add so much more to my life. I

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-41922659816731712072009-12-01T14:29:00.001+08:002009-12-10T08:17:21.247+08:00

I am grateful for my mother. I am grateful for each visit, every hour spent with her. Not all encounters are happy. Sometimes I am hurt by words of criticism and correction. These are not always easy to swallow. But ultimately, each encounter makes me a better and wiser person. I pray to God I can be the same to my children.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-35898604538917226962009-11-30T15:58:00.002+08:002009-11-30T21:52:46.539+08:00

I feel terribly sad when I think of the many times I have yelled and gotten mad at the kids this past week. They were getting on my nerves. All the yelling, the mess, the mundane demands that needed to be met ASAP. I was sick and tired. Now I realize how truly sick I am to have let my selfish id rule over my mind and my heart. Time flies. The kids are growing up right before my eyes. In a few

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-48900945460118629082009-11-30T11:00:00.002+08:002009-11-30T21:54:23.723+08:00

Fiestas are a fascinating thing. As I sat on the bus, I noticed that we slowed down to a crawl. I continued to look out the window and saw that there were more tambays than usual. Maybe because today's a holiday, I thought. Then, one by one, I saw the signs. There were babies clad in those, white, lacy, itchy-looking things. Young ladies appeared to be wearing their nicest blouses (with wide

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-74768741751475662262009-11-30T09:15:00.002+08:002009-11-30T21:58:28.862+08:00

One would think that after a loved one has died, you would remember him for all the big and important events. It's not the case, well, at least for me. I barely remember our dance on my wedding day. But I do remember how we almost laughed our eyeballs out over something very petty, I wouldn't dare write about it here; it'll be out of context and I don't want to risk sounding shallow. Or how,

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-15203784718959618812009-11-27T23:53:00.001+08:002009-11-27T23:54:42.293+08:00

I am pissed off. Really pissed off. I received a text message from my accountant, asking if I filed my ITR for 2008. She is in the process of registering my clinics. Without skipping a beat, I said I didn’t because I had been in training for the past four years with no pay. What she said next annoyed me to the max. She asked whether I didn’t practice during that time. What irked me the most was

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-22438546409230065222009-11-19T21:14:00.002+08:002009-11-20T09:06:05.003+08:00

I am pretty excited about my new planner, not only because of the countless reasons I mentioned in my last post. I am excited because next month, I will be starting my practice (3 clinics, in 3 different cities, 5 days a week) full blast. December, I suspect, would be like a “soft opening” because of the holidays. People are usually not too keen on having themselves checked during the holidays

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-36282659090364463182009-11-19T14:14:00.002+08:002009-11-20T09:03:01.883+08:00

Yehey! Today I have crossed out most of the urgent and/or important tasks on my to-do list. Some of them were musts that have been bugging me for days, even weeks (BIR, printing jobs,birthday presents for my sister, etc.). Others were errands – stuff related to the kids’ school activities, things to buy for an uncle, etc. But the real highlight of my day was (okay, brace yourself… here comes the

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-35686649428494594412009-11-15T05:33:00.002+08:002009-11-15T21:37:31.386+08:00

I am up early because hubby had left very early for the airport for a business trip. Nawala antok ko so I decided to say my prayers and a rosary for his safe trip.Yesterday was a good day and napahiya ako kay Lord kasi pinagbigyan N’ya na naman ako matapos kong ngumawa nang ngumawa. Tinuturuan N’ya talaga ako to be patient and to put my full trust in Him. As I awoke yesterday to the smell of

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-27913784283422482672009-11-13T10:52:00.001+08:002009-11-13T10:54:35.634+08:00

Today I ordered my first batch of business cards and prescription pads. I can imagine how thrilled I would be when the delivery comes in tomorrow. I grew up putting name tags on everything… notebooks, books… later when I started going to my high school dorm, things you did not dare imagine being labeled were labeled by my mother dear… sandos, undies, palanggana. You name it, it’s got my name on

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-19262365456274786122009-11-11T22:13:00.001+08:002009-11-13T10:57:45.484+08:00

Hubby and I are just so thrilled at the Lord’s generosity. Everything, every plan, is slowly falling into place.Just weeks ago, I felt lost. It felt like standing in the middle of a thick forest. I had no idea where to go… which direction to take. But God has been faithful, as always. He took hold of His bolo and just hacked away, making way, clearing paths for me. And I am truly grateful. Thank

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-65865423252131558592009-11-10T15:00:00.002+08:002009-11-11T22:12:27.451+08:00

Nothing makes me happier than looking at idyllic scenery. Mountains. Soft, wispy clouds amidst light blue sky. Green rice fields that stretch on and on. They remind me of how great it is to be alive.**********************************************************************************Sometimes errands and to-do lists suck the joy out of every day. I jump from one to the other, like short straight

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-4023505789367866552009-11-06T00:27:00.002+08:002009-11-06T08:47:36.987+08:00

I cannot believe almost three weeks have passed since I last “wrote”. Kaya naman pala I get this feeling of restlessness again. My writing, I mean, my outpouring of thoughts and feelings on paper/keyboard, helps keep me sane. (It makes me a bit uncomfortable saying “my writing” because I do not consider myself a writer). It keeps me anchored and gives me a fresh break from my usual super-nega

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-13505336454938673622009-11-01T21:37:00.000+08:002009-11-01T21:38:29.820+08:00

I consider it nothing short of a miracle, finding the clinic place and schedule that I wanted a day after hubby and I went to St. Jude to pray for guidance and much-needed help.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-16771346626737543262009-10-16T10:43:00.001+08:002009-10-16T10:45:47.500+08:00

Somebody better smack me on the head to remind me to:1. not worry too much2. stop stressing over things I cannot control3. be P-A-T-I-E-N-T

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-84632709899956623992009-10-15T20:57:00.001+08:002009-10-15T23:54:38.787+08:00

Kanina, pagkagaling namin ng anak kong limang taong gulang sa kanyang barbero, dumaan kami sa Dunkin’ Donuts bago maglakad pauwi. Pagkakain ng hapunan, kumuha ako ng platito at nilagay ang aking paboritong Nutty Choco, sabay hablot ng isang tinidor. Biglang nanumbalik sa akin ang mga alaala ng panahon noong high school na kumain kami ng isang kaklase sa Dunkin’ sa may National Bookstore sa Quezon

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-29363063053498062092009-10-15T19:22:00.001+08:002009-10-15T23:52:14.625+08:00

I get this weird sense of profound peace at the most unusual places. Earlier this evening, as my 5-year-old son and I walked from his barber to a nearby Dunkin’ Donuts and then back home, I looked around and felt like there was nothing I wanted more. It was the first time his barber gave him a clean shave of his sideburns with a few skillful swishes of his labaha. Seeing other parents walking

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-82769116846452863742009-10-15T00:25:00.001+08:002009-10-15T23:54:09.732+08:00

I apologize, dear God, for the sorry attitude I’ve been displaying since yesterday. Today I realized I have been doing my best to forget about that tiny incident the other day. Sorry talaga, Lord. Such a loser. Pasensya Ka na dahil pikon ako. Pikon na pikon.Humuhingi ako ng tawad dahil sa para bang nakalimutan ko na lahat ng mabubuti kong adhikain at pangarap. Naisip ko, isa yatang pagpapanggap

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-66929199533643235982009-10-04T22:10:00.000+08:002009-10-15T23:44:09.441+08:00

I sit here in my room. A room once shared with my one and only sister. The room of my childhood. Much has changed compared to how it was some 25 years ago. There is less clutter. None of the countless pillows that our beds used to have.Funny how lonely I feel being here by my lonesome, quiet self. As I sit here amidst the stillness, I realize with much amazement how big my world has grown.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-72989243237100905232009-10-01T12:09:00.002+08:002009-10-01T12:12:54.197+08:00

Truth be told, I feel a considerable amount of nervousness and anxiety at the prospect of starting my private practice. That’s on Monday, if all things proceed as planned. I try now to ‘cram’ my Consultative H--------- and T--------- book into my tiny brain. I worry about having forgotten my IM.I remind myself that I can do all things because Jesus strengthens me. He has never failed me. I tell

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-59312766436394816592009-09-30T08:27:00.000+08:002009-10-01T12:09:42.307+08:00

Dahil sa perwisyong dulot ni Bagyong Ondoy, walang pasok ang mga bata ng isang linggo. Kaya kahapon, pinadalhan ko ng text ang aking asawa. Sabi ko, ano kaya kung dalhin namin sa playground sa Mall of Asia ang mga bata? Ilang araw na kasi silang nakakulong dito sa bahay. Maganda rin siguro na makalabas sila, makatakbo ng konti, makapag-release ng pent-up energy. I thought it was a great idea.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-10045467539196107582009-09-25T17:52:00.004+08:002009-10-01T12:03:10.302+08:00

After I had passed my subspecialty diplomate exam, I was very eager to start my practice. I felt like I was ready to take on the world. I described the day after I learned I passed as the “first day of the rest of my life” (Aug. 17 post). After 13 years (that’s post-college) of non-stop study and training, it felt like I have finally reached the finish line.Then reality set in.First, hubby and I

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-8773403757941124512009-09-24T14:20:00.003+08:002009-09-25T17:52:46.249+08:00

Ahh… sa wakas. Kahapon ko pa gustong ikwento sa’yo ang nangyari sa maghapon ko. Ewan ko ba. Umuwi akong pagod na pagod ang mga paa at binti dahil sa kalalakad pero masaya akong nakarating sa bahay. I felt fulfilled.Sinimulan ko ang araw ko sa pagliligpit ng aking higaan. Pagbaba, kinausap ko ang aking panganay at pangalawang anak. Kahit pupungas-pungas pa ako, sinisigurado ko na makausap ko at

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-68715772377151039922009-09-23T23:30:00.001+08:002009-09-23T23:32:55.622+08:00

I wanted to write about how tiring yet fulfilling today has been. A few interesting things have happened and I can’t wait to tell you about it. But now, I have this huge headache… so I’ll just proceed with jotting down the things I learned today…Today, I learned…1.… how to encash a check.2.… how to deposit a check.3.… how to commute to PDEA (LRT – MRT – tricycle)4.… that one can walk from PDEA to

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-67179982336814999642009-09-11T15:10:00.001+08:002009-09-11T15:17:06.081+08:00

Plans are made. Then reality sets in.No matter how much planning or anticipation one puts in, things are bound to get bumped by unforeseen circumstances. Weather. Heavy rains and floods, to be exact. Health. Other people. Lack of resources.A wise person plans ahead. And an even wiser person makes plans AND is able to improvise as the need arises.I remember when I was in high school, one of our

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-22111426052977033702009-09-10T10:26:00.001+08:002009-09-11T15:09:54.689+08:00

10 September 200910:26 AMOh, what great comfort!As usual, I find out that the things I’ve been fretting about were baseless and, therefore, useless.The recent weeks were supposed to be the most relaxed and free weeks of my adult life. But instead of being happy and enjoying each moment, I felt pressured. I perceived my mother’s words of encouragement and gentle reminders as subtle ‘demands’ for

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-40288282365861810572009-09-08T16:05:00.001+08:002009-09-09T09:46:31.128+08:00

Life has been great. After what seemed to be a slow creep, my career is about to be launched. I feel like a fledgling, perched on the nest’s edge, waiting for mother bird’s gentle nudge. I know my wings are ready. So many years have been spent strengthening them for the long flight. But now, as I get ready to take off, I tremble and feel a pang of fear.Can I do it? Do I truly know which way to go

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-22087237083035269342009-09-04T09:35:00.002+08:002009-09-06T23:46:53.185+08:00

There are certain things about myself that I am neither proud of nor happy about.For instance, I do not like how I get swayed so easily. Yesterday, despite all the errands (groceries, things that I needed to buy for the kids, birthday present for hubby, etc), I was bent on going to St. Jude afterwards for our Thursday novena. I find myself at a fork in the road and am badly in need of guidance

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-33991280045112401202009-09-03T13:48:00.000+08:002009-09-03T13:52:48.159+08:00

More on declutteringIt is not helpful at all times.My last post brought back memories of my life in med school. Whenever I needed to study for a tough exam (that is practically, every single day), I find myself fixing things in my tiny space in the dorm room (I shared the room with three other people). I fix my bed. I wash my undies. I fix my closet. Finally, I stack my huge textbooks repeatedly

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-54183399610075561232009-09-03T13:10:00.003+08:002009-09-03T13:34:46.178+08:00

When I stand on the edge of a very important decision or a really difficult task, I find myself puttering about. I grab hold of my to-do list and set out to do the most mundane tasks. Simply put, the no-brainer to-dos get first pick. Next to praying and writing, this is the best way I know how to handle the stresses of my adult life. One should never underestimate the peace brought forth by the

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-19173631811731333212009-09-01T09:35:00.001+08:002009-09-01T09:39:20.825+08:00

I feel so stupid. How could I have let a really important deadline pass me by?I am so ashamed of myself.Now… deep breath. Forgive myself. Forget the past. Time to move on.And before I forget… what a wonderful (long) weekend we had! Nothing beats time with the whole family (whole meaning mine, my sister’s, plus Mommy). Sharing yummy food. Watching the kids having fun - in the pool, chasing a tiny

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-86666964455595562812009-08-27T17:05:00.000+08:002009-08-28T00:45:28.813+08:00

(Written on my phone as I waited in line for my doctor)1. Be grateful always to everyone (especially to God) and for everything - be it big or small.2. Never talk ill of others. When they treat you well it will put yourself to shame.3. We can make plans but they can only take us so far. God ALWAYS takes care of the rest.4. When our plans are not up to speed with God’s, be ready to improvise.5.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-44617432285996660662009-08-27T17:00:00.000+08:002009-08-28T00:44:07.802+08:00

… for being super-duper grouchy to everyone at home - hubby, the kids, and the yayas.… for missing scripture and prayers.… for missing out on my gratitude journal for two days. No wonder I was being so whiny and negative about things.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-69566868252266546742009-08-25T14:38:00.003+08:002009-10-01T12:03:53.235+08:00

This thing is beginning to give me a headache… oh Lord, please give me the guts to say ‘No’ when I mean it. The guts to say it over and over when the person asking is unrelenting. The guts to stick to my guns when the other person refuses, time and again, to take the ‘No’ for an answer. The courage to make decisions for myself and to set my priorities, specifically, to choose time with my family

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-50618868868372508982009-08-21T15:12:00.001+08:002009-08-21T15:18:11.801+08:00

The letter came today. Now it's official. Praise God! Thanks Mama Mary, Saint peter and Saint Paul. Bless evryone who prayed for and with me.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-4428657802225970312009-08-19T10:25:00.000+08:002009-08-19T10:31:24.550+08:00

I have decided to make good use of my time at home. I set out to teach our youngest her ABCs, and to help our 4-year-old to master writing her name.It’s embarrassing. Our youngest, now three, does not know her ABCs. Her Kuya knew all 26 letters by heart at that age. I do not remember consciously teaching him the alphabet because two years ago, I was buried deep in work/training, hospital duty,

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-5316918269069903632009-08-18T13:27:00.007+08:002009-08-19T10:20:22.789+08:00

A strange thing happened today. When the kids came home from school at noon, the yaya came up to me and said, “Ate, dalaga na po ang anak n’yo”. My first thought was… what? She had her menses?! Then she handed me a bouquet of 3 pink roses, in full bloom. Normally, the sight of flowers would have elicited feelings of happiness and pleasure. Definitely not this time. The next thing that came to my

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-31086289085968034492009-08-16T23:09:00.002+08:002009-08-16T23:33:35.430+08:00

Once again, I am in awe of God’s generosity and faithfulness.Against all odds, He has proven once more that He is on my side. In the blink of an eye, He has wiped away every tear, every pain, every fear, and every sense of desperation.God must have allowed all the events of the past two weeks to happen to push me to pray more… to urge me to rely on His strength instead of my own. The experience

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-57905546616805888552009-08-15T11:55:00.001+08:002009-08-15T11:59:40.563+08:00

Tomorrow marks the first day of the rest of my life.I am scared. I worry that I would not be able to recall the things I’ve been reading and reviewing since the beginning of the year. I am scared of not making it. When fear takes its hold on me, I call on the Lord, and Mama Mary, and St. Paul and St. Jude. I think of all my friends and loved ones who promise to include me in my prayers.Everything

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-54062253568685306142009-08-14T02:19:00.000+08:002009-08-15T11:55:33.099+08:00

Dear Me:Tandaan!Coffee… bawal.Chocolate… bawal.Maalat - includes chippy, piattos (lahat ng chips, okay?), toyong sawsawan… bawal.Pati decaffeinated na kape… bawal (umaasim na nga t’yan mo sa dami ng gamot).‘Wag na tigas ulo, okay?Para sa kabutihan mo rin lahat ng ‘to.Conscientiously yours,MeP.S. This was written after I rejoiced after noting that my vertigo had improved, after which I devoured a

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-72207658625785625652009-08-13T18:38:00.002+08:002009-08-13T18:44:28.086+08:00

Yesterday, Teacher M asked to speak to us about our 4-year-old Ate. She told hubby na medyo maingay daw sa klase. And nahihirapan pa sa pagsulat ng pangalan n’ya. Nababaliktad (jumbled) yung mga letra. And she still stammers occasionally when she gets too excited (we almost do not see this at home anymore... a big improvement). So we will try to be more diligent abut her practicing her writing. I

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-80619898722654249502009-08-12T22:31:00.000+08:002009-08-13T18:36:41.271+08:00

Our 4-year-old: Mommy, (looking intently at my ear) I think maybe you should not let your friends see your ear.Me: Why?Our 4-year-old: Cause maybe they will think it’s dirty but it’s not dirty… it’s sugat.Few days ago, over dinner...Our 5-year-old: Daddy, your van is making the air dirty because it’s old. Maybe we should buy a new one.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-45070659070071077082009-08-11T14:12:00.002+08:002009-08-12T03:13:01.144+08:00

The yayas have vacuumed our bedroom, wiped weeks-old dust off of several surfaces, and changed the sheets. I made myself a mug of decaf and slowly made my way upstairs. And then, as if a switch has been turned… off I went. In a mad dash, as if overcome by a spirit, I scrambled about - unpacked the suitcase from the hospital, fixed my toiletries, stacked my books.I did these despite the terrible

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-36110842919977968632009-08-11T00:23:00.002+08:002009-08-11T00:29:09.196+08:00

It takes all the courage and faith I can muster to keep myself from giving in to depression. It is so easy to allow myself to become gripped with fear.This morning, as I lay in my hospital bed feeling dizzy, a colleague calls to ask if I wanted to join in the practice/preparation for the exam on Sunday.Everybody’s preparing for the exam, I thought. And here I am, stuck in the hospital, stuck with

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-75944038772044410692009-08-08T17:02:00.000+08:002009-08-08T17:03:00.128+08:00

Only eight days to go before the big exam and I am here, stuck in a hospital room feeling… terrible. I still have the tinnitus. Now, not just my ear but my whole head feels fuller than ever. Throbbing. Buti na lang nabawasan na ang sakit sa tenga ko with the pain relievers. But I have vertigo, a huge headache, generalized myalgia, blurring of vision, plus palpitations na mukhang side effects ng

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-38176244477367114702009-08-07T04:13:00.001+08:002009-08-07T04:18:30.926+08:00

So. It looks like it’s Varicella Zoster Oticus. Finally, this ‘condition’ has a name. It’s been getting worse and it relieves me to know that there’s hope for it to resolve. But it worries me that I might not be well enough in time for the exam (just 9 days to go!).I have been turning in my bed; couldn’t get to sleep. The ringing in my ear; the fullness; the dull, aching pain; and, the sharp pain

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-11084884533163892342009-08-06T03:19:00.003+08:002009-08-06T03:25:40.187+08:00

Now I have finally figured out how to post in Manila time (grabe). The only problem: because of the adjustment, the post date and time of all my previous posts also changed! Oh well. My ok-ok self will just have to learn to let this go.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-87157574575786127052009-08-05T23:30:00.001+08:002009-08-06T03:28:34.030+08:00

We survived the day! ☺Today… the past several days, actually… I underwent some much-needed pruning. (Yesterday, both of our yayas left for the province). These were days filled with many discoveries about myself, my family and kids, and my God. No yayas. No cable TV (I just feel awful that I missed today’s very historic event - Tita Cory’s funeral… why did the cable service have to break down

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-46297278351651877972009-08-04T05:31:00.001+08:002009-08-06T03:08:42.574+08:00

The day is turning out to be not too bad.Cooked tinola for lunch. I forgot to take out the innards and to chop the thighs into halves and it came out a little bland (which was good for me and my low-salt diet) and too greasy. But the kids loved it… they were profuse with thanks, so dahil sa kanila… panalo! Hay, sarap.The three kids and I and the nanny all ate at the table (the other nanny went

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-9662073319082009902009-08-04T00:45:00.000+08:002009-08-04T00:45:00.656+08:00

I took a nap from midnight to 3 AM, and then stayed up until 6:30 AM to read and study some, to surf the net, and be with the little boy - meds, spongebath, plenty of water, some biscuits, and gave in to every whim. He wanted his pillow turned every so often as he said they become too hot for his head, and requested for the fan, then the aircon, then the fan again… he asked for his blanket to

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-74418396859036700372009-08-02T06:16:00.001+08:002009-08-06T03:11:28.975+08:00

Things have been quite crazy around here with hubby and the kids getting sick. Now, I finally get some quiet time as the whole household takes the afternoon nap. Quiet time, yes. Peace? I am not sure. When everything is quiet, it seems like the perfect time for me to finally concentrate and read and prepare for my upcoming exam. But it is during these silent times that this tinnitus in my left

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-70395678305623692172009-08-01T07:09:00.001+08:002009-08-07T04:24:42.362+08:00

As I ponder on the events of the past couple of days, I feel that God has been very active (as usual). He has begun to strip me of my little and big concerns, gently pushing me outside of my comfort zone, while teaching me a few important lessons:· I have been concerned these past weeks about my weight gain, especially since I noted I was beginning to have “double-chin” on my pictures.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-46416255206011988932009-07-30T12:22:00.000+08:002009-08-01T00:37:18.976+08:00

For the last twenty-four hours, I have been battling with this constant high-pitched ringing/hissing in my left ear. It sounds like the noise a microphone makes when it gets too close to the speaker. Or like those high-pitched, non-stop sounds certain bugs make in the dark. There’s also this sensation of fullness, pretty much like having a cup over my ear. When I get up from sitting or from bed,

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-84400096037748763242009-07-28T02:43:00.000+08:002009-07-31T04:16:54.462+08:00

I am panic-stricken. Woke up very late today after having watched TV last night. I took one look at my countdown and, suddenly, I am gripped with fear… 20 days to go. My mind wanders to lost time, all those wasted hours.Now, I take one deep breath. I focus. I pray to God. I ask, no… beg, for forgiveness for all the wasted time and ask for help and enlightenment. One more exam. With God’s help,

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-84842773611616007572009-07-17T04:58:00.000+08:002009-07-17T04:58:00.364+08:00

When the headlines stink (which happens… umm, everyday) and another friend leaves this archipelago (now this one happens every month or two, no kidding), Bamboo gives me hope.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-9073331322387348182009-07-17T04:16:00.000+08:002009-07-17T04:16:00.581+08:00

Today feels like a milestone! It’s a little thing but for me, a milestone just the same. Today is the day I submitted my research paper, one that I have been working on, albeit off and on, for more than a year. Sweat, blood, and tears. It feels great. Never mind the pouring rain and the exorbitant taxi cab fare I had to shell out. When I got back I found myself smiling to myself as I turned the

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-71965659078880825942009-07-11T10:30:00.000+08:002009-07-11T10:30:00.878+08:00

I was walking along the quiet streets parallel to Taft Avenue. It was quiet save for the big drops of rain hitting the pavement. My steps were surprisingly light as I carried my backpack with my huge, HUGE textbook inside. I tucked my purse under one arm, held my old umbrella and began to give thanks - finally, some peace and quiet, away from the maddening crowd.Earlier, I stepped out of the

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-28759202412309000802009-07-10T12:50:00.000+08:002009-07-10T20:16:46.888+08:00

I feel great, not to mention, grateful after I have made my entry for the day in my gratitude journal. Which is good ‘cause if not, what’s the point, right? It’s remarkable how very much different I am feeling right now compared to the past three days. The glaring difference is that I was able to accomplish today what has been sitting on my to-do list for the longest time.I bought the ‘good’

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-17724235374538466632009-07-09T13:59:00.000+08:002009-07-10T01:04:04.222+08:00

I do realize now that I let the kids watch too much TV. Tonight, at the dinner table, I was asking my son how his day at school went. He refused to answer the query and said, “Later, Mommy. I will be right back”.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-25294989484527079142009-07-08T05:25:00.000+08:002009-07-09T22:37:43.584+08:00

Tomorrow, another friend of mine is leaving for the U.S. She’s the third friend to leave for the same destination within the last 6o days.Every time someone leaves, I feel like a small part of me dies. I cannot really explain it. Is it because I lose another of my few close friends? Does it make me feel sad to realize that many people feel the need to leave this country because they see no future

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-62865699761503387102009-07-05T10:41:00.000+08:002009-07-09T22:47:59.207+08:00

The little one puts on Ate’s old uniform and black shoes but refuses to be brought to school. After Ate and Kuya had left, she told the nanny, “The school bus left me. I’m gonna call the police”.Later during the day, Kuya asks, “Mommy, what does ‘working undercover’ mean?” Whew. Another tough one.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-4743702126165546322009-07-01T17:22:00.000+08:002009-07-09T22:52:39.911+08:00

I have written a page but stopped myself when I noticed I have been ranting, beating myself up and “crying” over spilled milk. So I hit the delete button and now proceed to listing down things I have accomplished today:1. Spent 6 hours at the library with a 1-hour break in between2. Had some fun at the bookstore, buying supplies for my index card hack; some handy-dandy notebooks for the kids, too

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-37900365275827981402009-06-29T16:39:00.000+08:002009-07-10T03:20:41.742+08:00

Today, while looking at Ate as she was puttering around, barefoot, with her toys and siblings, I couldn’t help but notice how pretty she is. Her face was sweaty and her baby hairs stuck to her forehead. What a precious gift! What precious gifts these children are.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-24762817537685515162009-06-29T14:14:00.000+08:002009-07-09T22:56:02.860+08:00

You’ll remember me when the west wind moves among the fields of barley. You can tell the sun in his jealous sky as we walked in fields of goldSting’s Fields of Gold. Perfect poetry.

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-41772842453228484942009-06-27T18:34:00.000+08:002009-07-10T00:51:43.666+08:00

Some difficult questions asked by the kidsKuya: Mommy, what does ‘attack’ mean?Me: Why? (puzzled) Where did you hear that? (I was thinking of attack as in heart attack)Kuya: Because Patrick told Spongebob, ‘Spongebob, hurry! It’s going to attack!’Don’t ask me how I managed to answer that question. Here’s another one:Kuya: Mommy, why can’t we go to the brightest planet?Me: Uh… I don’t know.Kuya:

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-59081455783016329492009-06-27T17:30:00.000+08:002009-07-10T03:22:23.557+08:00

Today was a good day. Technically, it was yesterday that was a good day. Anyway, apart from the sudden death of the King of Pop, everything went well. It’s great to be in an upbeat mood after a week of sulking and yelling.I had been cooped up the whole week, mainly my fault though as I became too lazy to drag myself out of the house and to the library. The kids had two days off right smack in the

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-1793584036081133342009-06-26T16:34:00.000+08:002009-07-09T23:18:48.899+08:00

It probably sounds untrue to you when I say that my father’s death was, in some ways, tougher on me compared to my mother or sister because I am a doctor. Not fair. Not real. But I am convinced. I knew things they didn’t. It was the only time in my life when knowledge did not bring comfort; instead, it brought great pain. My mom and my sister had kept hopes up. After all, he was getting the best

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8633690523417343545.post-57525996158639306422009-06-26T16:23:00.000+08:002009-07-09T23:16:43.830+08:00

It’s been 31 months but it still surprises me how little things creep up from behind me at the most unexpected moments. I sit quietly and study for my exam when I come across this: “The most common cause of anemia in the setting of malignancy is anemia of chronic disease”. As my eyes lay on this statement, a strong, sharp tug pulled on my heart. My mind goes back to 2½ years ago when I, being in

Karenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11745770989487948239noreply@blogger.com0